When was the first time you really felt like a grown up (if ever)?
I was always a homebody and my mom always told us to be in the house by dark when we were little. One thing you never wanted to hear is her calling your name ever or you were in big trouble. When we got older she got more lenient and we could stay out a little later like 9 or 9:30 unless we were going to church or something then there was no time limit cause church was like a marathon. This one Wednesday night I had just turned 18 in September I was feeling so big and grownup like I could do anything I wanted to I had met this man who was pursuing me really hard I invited him to church and he came my naïve behind thinking he is really into me this lying 35 claiming he is 22 then 28 years old man had my 17 then 18 years old nose wide open. I got out of church and me being all grown now was going to walk home with him at night it was a great walk even if it cast me my senior activities due to the child that came from me being so damn grown. You live and you learn.
I have always been a dream or a person that likes to write and a person who likes to think and then I became a person who likes to speak so the things that I would write down I started seeing them aloud and watching them happen around me. I would always see things like a person who didn’t agree with what I saw or what I had said say it’s not because of what I said that this thing happened but I knew that it was because of what I said that it came about because of the sequence of events that took place that made it happen and it would make me chuckle because I didn’t knew that how it happened the process of what happened wouldn’t have happened like that if I hadn’t said it like that so I became a habit of mine to speak it into existence and watch it happen I’ve always been an optimist and I enjoy being an optimist because things always work out in my favor even when it doesn’t look like it. There’s always room for a win and since I’m a winner I always win in the end so my hobby is winning and writing about what I won. Whether that is weight loss Money understanding or peace of mind there are always little wins in everything.
What details of your life could you pay more attention to?
Sometimes the people in my life who I find myself sharing my life with or not the best company the little details that mattered to me the most are not held in high esteem, and it seems to bring my vibration down like if I want to celebrate an accomplishment that I feel is important You would think someone who is supposed to be your biggest cheerleader would also be your biggest fan as well but sometimes that person is only there to be your devils advocate, and be the one to always try and tell you that they are the realist or the pessimist in your life And it doesn’t help you get anywhere when you just want somebody to talk to you instead of constantly give you that underhanded backhand that you wasn’t looking for or that you didn’t need
I have learned to pay attention to those small details, and no win to stop giving details to people who were only give back. I needed rhetoric instead of needed conversation. I now talk to people who give me considerate confirmation even if it’s constructive criticism, the objective word is constructive, and it’s necessary not unnecessary always giving with love not sarcasm and I can appreciate that.
I sometimes wonder what happened to society I was reading a post about a person who went into a fast food restaurant to get something to eat not inside through the drive-through and they ordered some nuggets because they had a deal going on you order the 10 or 20 piece and you’ll get it a free fry with it small or large so she got a large and matter fact she got two free large fries with it. She told them the kind of sauces that she wanted for the nuggets and when I’m through the line she paid for it before she got there cause she ordered it online, the app since everything is done by app these days, but as she got through the line paid for her stuff left got home she realized that not only has she not gotten the kind of nuggets that she ordered. She didn’t even get any sauce for the nuggets as she thought about that, she just kept thinking how society is always complaining about wages and pay and how people don’t get a living wage and she just kept thinking how the government keeps lifting wages to make life easier but when she needs something and she goes to get simple things like the food that she wants to eat from a simple fast food restaurant Who is now going to be making $15-$20 an hour she can’t even get her order correct even though she’s putting so much time to learn what she’s learned at the job that she does that she hast to get correct or someone’s life could be in danger or someone’s Family could be hurt if she gets it wrong and she thinks about how all of these people don’t take their career and live seriously but they always take their pay seriously but they don’t put in the effort. It is when it comes time to go towards that future, they just want society to feel sorry for them and give them a leg up And then she wanders why are we as a society OK with that? Why are we always so willing to give give give instead of challenging people to do better with their self and their goals in life when will we start letting them know that if you want better, you need to do better you can’t expect a hand out all the time and still think that you deserve everything that other people have worked really hard for you can’t become an overnight sensation when you’ve only practice one Time, you want become a superstar singer if you only sang in the bathroom, so that record deal will not be coming your way you won’t be the lead cook at a restaurant if your favorite dish is cereal us as a society have got to begin to stand up for the things that we have worked hard for and stop letting people jump in and demand what they have not earned because it’s not fair to each and everyone of us and it’s definitely not OK when we keep getting the wrong stuff for what we paid for that was just an observation. Have a great evening.
One thing I do not spend a lot of time on is self-care and time meditating for myself I spend a lot of time wondering where I should have went right when I went wrong instead of doing self evaluation’s and healing I think I would do better spending my time on self-care and self healing, and not worrying about the little hurdles that come toward me that I know, I have no power over that they are there for a reason and not to make a mountain out of a mole hill because some people are just broken and it is not my responsibility to fix them. I have to work on me and once I’m done working on me the right vibes and intensity and person will enter my life who matches my vibe, and since I know that I have to focus on what brings me peace and happiness and exit out of anything that takes away my peace and my happiness so that I stay on track and I move forward with my best life so these are things that I’ve learned and that I am working on every day sometimes I fall down but I always get back up. It might not be quick, but it is getting faster and faster.
When I was growing up, holidays were the best time of year. It was something you look forward to you celebrate it with family and friends doing things being out and about (I am so upset. I had a whole post right here and this phone decided to delete it, and I have to start again, anyway just a little pissed off about it) I loved being out with my sister and brothers or even just shopping alone thinking about them and the things I would do for them for the holidays or the things we were going to do together there were times when I would see something, and we knew each other so well that we knew each other‘s interests And likes and dislikes, so I love whichever way always make us desire to do something special for each other. If it was my mom, she was a human information seeker so I would always get her something like books or something to figure out like puzzles and things like that if it was my sister, she like trinkets and little gadget type things so if I was in a store and I saw like a little Figurine type teddy bear I would pick up a few of those knowing that she would appreciate it. If it was my brothers, they were always into moving parts so it was going to be something like a model car or a game that they had to figure out or a bike to put together, we all knew each other so well because we cared about each others inner workings so we did whatever it took to be a part of each other’s lives if it was a national holiday like the Fourth of July we planned out what to cook we were going to be at a park we were going to have some kind of major Food gathering and we were going to play games and have fun and be with either a bunch of friends, playing baseball or tag or whatever it was. We were all going to be together doing it and join each other laughing and just having a all-around good time for most of the day, and that was the most exhilarating part of life everything made sense even if it was the camaraderie of people around you one year we had been out to Santa Anita mall in California and it was just a few of us on the bus on the way back home, and the bus driver was in such good spirits But he allowed us to jump off the bus grab a Christmas tree and get back on. That was the kind of care that all of us have for each other. The seasons mattered we cooked with each other whether it was my mom doing bread my sister doing something in the kitchen, me baking cookies at the table, my brother sitting over there on the couch with my nieces and nephews, watching some kind a game or a movie
That was outrageously loud and laughing with the kids. My brother has the most infectious laugh that when he lives it trickles down the block and you can just feel people coming because it’s an atmosphere of happiness around holidays were time to get together. Enjoy each other, always think about the next person and have a feeling of connectedness And we were the kind of family that didn’t just bring gifts for our mom. We bought gifts for everyone if we’re coming, we’re going to bring something for everybody so that we all know that we have let you know you matter to us with my own children, the look on their faces when they would come out and see all the stuff under the tree it was like they would be in shock and then watching them dance to whatever new game it was that they were playing singing along to that new Michael Jackson game trying to get the beat right so they didn’t get out was funny in itself it would take me back to going to visit my grandmother and see how my cousin would be so overjoyed to find out that he got the Michael Jackson doll or a vest or shoe or whatever it was memories like that stay with you as life goes on because I no longer have my grandparents but I can still see them in my mind like they’re right here with me. I no longer have some of my cousins, but I can still see them, saying my name and talking to me and laughing and being just as silly as they were back, then and a serious as they were but still loving me all the way through my holidays are not the same now because I didn’t vet well and the person that I’m with doesn’t cherish the things that I cherish or love the things that I love so when my birthday comes I don’t get to do the things that I would do with my family as I grew up I don’t get to do Christmas or New Year’s or Thanksgiving the way that I remember it as I was growing up I don’t get to be there to bury my love ones or see how life is and feel connected the way that I used to feel some choices are regrettable. One thing I have learned, though life is full of change, and you can’t keep doing the same thing expecting a different result, because that is the very definition of insanity and I am not insane. Anyway, my holidays are different now, but they won’t be different forever
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Self love is important. I have the love me before anything.
Write about your most epic baking or cooking fail.
I love to cook one of my favorite things to make at holiday time is macaroni and cheese made from scratch. I made some macaroni and cheese for my husband to show him that I knew how to make it and instead of him, just eating it before the festivities start it Around Thanksgiving he decided he was going to turn my masterpiece into one of his resounding concoctions and add it get this some marshmallows to my macaroni and cheese. I was disgusted by it and did not eat any of it. It did not turn out right it reminded me of a kid who is trying to do a experimental product in the kitchen like making, a peanut butter and pickle sandwich or a honey and mustard, peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It did not turn out well at all. After that point, I decided I would not cook for him ever again he complained and complained that I was not doing my womanly duty for him after that, I didn’t care because I felt as if he did not appreciate the things that I was doing for him And my kids were grown and gone and I did not have a reason to be slaving in the kitchen for anyone when I could just eat out or throw something quick together but I now have started trying to get back in the habit of doing cooking for a better purpose not Jess Because I want to eat anyway that is my experience with cooking for a better purpose and my purpose for cooking. That was an epic fail.
If you had to give up one word that you use regularly, what would it be?
I have several conversations with a certain person during the day and as I am talking to this person, I am always saying in my mind. In my thoughts when I walk away this person is so stupid. Why do they think like this? That was stupid this is stupid. Why do they act so stupid? Why is there behavior so stupid Why do I put up with this stupid Ness of this person every other word out of my mouth when dealing with this person is always the word stupid coming out of my mouth or a certain instances coming out of my mouth about this person makes me think that I am becoming stupid from dealing with them and I keep thinking that you are a product of the company that you keep so I always try to rephrase my thoughts and cautioned myself to put a cap on what I’m about to say or do so that I do not let that word stupid come out of my mouth because I know the more that I said the more I am bringing that back into my life so that is the one word there are others, but that is the main word that I really am working on getting rid of out of my thoughts out of my mouth and out of my heart when it comes to things that happen during my daily routine.
I’m tired of people having to apologize for having an opinion or speaking facts and having to retract their words
This has to stop all of this is inappropriate and is not OK we are a complete society Who have gone almost completely insane with this overboard trying to be overly right there is a point where you either stand on enough is enough or you stand on too much wrong is just wrong. I know you always say the Bible says to love but the Bible also says follow the basic instructions before leaving Earth and nowhere in there does it say keep doing wrong and you’ll be forgiven, nowhere does it say that, the most important thing that it teaches is somewhere in there you have to start attempting to do right or you’re just doing it in vain you can’t keep doing wrong and expect that the forgiveness that you’re asking for is a genuine thing or that the life you’re living is the right one to be living even if you’re just being a good person, right is right and wrong is wrong, stop living in this delusion that love is love, because God‘s love is the real love and if you don’t know what that is then you are not following it you need to read and understand and find out but that’s neither here nor there. I’m not preaching and I’m definitely not always right but I am on the right path about this they need to stop bullying everyone when they don’t say the right thing that they want to hear! I do not and will not stand by and be told that IAM something other than a genuinely born woman to please someone who is a man trying to say he’s a woman when DNA proves otherwise! I don’t have a Adams apple I don’t have a XY chromosome I have a XX chromosome fallopian tubes and eggs IAM a woman. @cnn, @blm @fox13news @blackwomen @corelle942 @lgbtq @Celebrity news. @LATimes
The LGBTQ and their allies which are the to far left (I am a democrat but not that kind) has stolen so much of societies freedoms taken away our freedom of SPEECH our young innocents and our ability to speak on things that we hold dear in this society I was watching (listening to) an interview today with one of my favorite singers (Ne-yo) and he spoke the truth but got backlash by the ABC community and ended up having to create this lavished apology for just speaking his truth matter of fact the truth and that is inappropriate. No one should have that kind of power over the words and feelings and or thoughts of someone else’s truth, they do not run this world. We live in a diverse society and we do not have to bow down to know one percent portion of it just because their feelings get hurt.
What strategies do you use to increase comfort in your daily life?
I use meditation to help clear my mind and think about my goals for the day and visualize my future plans relaxation to help me take the weight off from the things I’ve done during the day and filter out and work through whatever it is that I needed to redo
The struggle is now not forever 