It had been a week and he was still not doing well when I called 911 for him he had scared me and I wasn’t going to lose him. He was talking crazy but he was alive, I couldn’t put my finger on it and I didn’t know how to cope with it but I knew he wasn’t ready to go home in a short amount of time he was putting his affairs in order telling me what to do and how I would be able to sustain myself after he was gone and that was not rational to me him being in his 40s we have a whole life to live and I kept telling him that but he wasn’t trying to hear me he just kept saying let him go. When they finally got him to a point where he was starting to get of sound mind he began to blame me for keeping him there and that hurt even worse because when I care about somebody their life is the most important thing to me and their survival is paramount to everything else. I would never want anything to happen to him despite his treatment of people or me I still want him around because everybody deserves every chance until that last chance is given now I feel like an outsider because I wanted to check on him and was told they will see if he’s up for company (While staying at a non-immediate family members house) when I’m his wife now I’m a part of everybody else amazing that really hurts when I am the one that got him to the hospital it’s crazy if I’m only the tables were turned.
Tag: fathers
A piece of paper
I had to take a long ride with my husband to advocate for him out of town but for me it was a time to get away with someone I love ❤️ and also help him convey how he is doing on a daily basis like I always do. Instead of this being a relaxing time it became an interrogation of all the things he feels I have done wrong because of his belief that he should have many relationships but not let those people know he has a wife or mate and I feel that’s wrong because he is taking their right to choose away because he can not comment to any of them so I feel like he is using them and he gets angry 😡 with me and denys me the things I desire.
He told me on this trip we are only married on paper he is not really married to me and as I thought 💭 about that and all that I have done for him it really hurt 😔 my feelings that he could be that disrespectful to me but then again what did I expect from a person that uses and disrespects women all the time in (including his own sisters) the first place can’t blame anyone but myself. Happy Saturday the last one in February! Happy Black History month
He did it on purpose
I was out looking at my car today I saw all these scratches on her at first couldn’t understand what had happened to my baby then I realized my husband’s son is the only one who washes my car and he washed my car with a rag that had branches and leaves in it and didn’t care what it did to my car even though I am the one who drives him around everywhere he goes I felt like that was messed up and if I had the choice he would walk everywhere from now on frfr anyway happy Monday
He is so evil
I was up late last night trying to find new friends and enjoy my night when my husband begins to tell me to go to bed like I’m a child he tells me to chill out cause I was laughing at some of the conversations I was having with my friends on my computer to the point that he came to see who I was talking to and demanding that I stop being happy and go to bed saying I would have to get up early when that was not true. When I told him that he began to hit me over and over again and yell at me for no reason like what I was doing was so terrible then he took my things away (my phone, computer, and pad and told me my things were not mine which was crazy I was so upset I was crying and couldn’t think straight as he kept demanding that I listen to him or he would hurt me again he kept forcing me to drink and telling me how much he doesn’t care about how I feel it was so disrespectful and disheartening but I made it through he will get his soon enough.
Merry Christmas/ family day
Today most of us get together to celebrate the end of the year, the birth of Christ or each other making it through another year. Because so many of us didn’t make it for verious reasons so on this December 25,2021 celebrate yourself and always remember no matter what happens in your life you are wonderful and worth a celebration everyday you wake up and see your beautiful face. Have a wonderful holiday no matter how you celebrate it. If no one told you I am telling you you are awesome sauce!!!
I love my friends and family
I have had many people in my life from the time I was born many of which I call to this day my family and close friends. Many of us are taught through words and life experience that sometimes friends can sometimes considered closer than a family member or the one person who can understand exactly what the person is going through.anyway.
Saturday November 20th
Today is my day to get out and handle business enjoy life and have fun in any way that I can I hope that you are doing the same life is too short to not enjoy it I think I’m going to work out and find something to cook and prepare for the week to come since Thanksgiving is next week I’m very excited about that because I love the holiday season I miss the family time and all of the shenanigans that go on with it maybe this year will be better then years past happy holidays but I also will be watching what I eat because I’m still on this weight loss journey
I am always interested
I love adventure and exploring the world around me I enjoy being happy and trying new things weather it be food, adventure parks, sight seeing, or meeting new people I am always interested in making life the best it can be.
I find myself looking for new avenues to build wealth and help people understand that everyone needs help every now and then. I am working really hard to get back in school and finish my degree up and move forward with my life of working with children giving them a love of learning. Starting at birth to 5 years.
I am excited to travel around the world and see how other countries teach and help their children grow into productive young men and women it’s a wonderful thing to see children grow and learn anyway happy Wednesday. What have you always been interested in let’s chat about it? Money, relationship, passion,sex, friendship, travel,men, women, what?
He’s Jealous of my past
When I met my ex-husband I was in a very vulnerable state I was young and needed to feel appreciated and loved it was the simple things that mattered to me and he saw that and did what I needed at the time.
I had no idea he was just grooming me to be blinded to the dirt he was doing behind my back so yes I loved him unconditionally to the detriment of everything I loved or that matter to me in my life.
Fast-forward my new husband the libra ♎ is always probing for information whatever he can use against anyone at any given moment he kept asking me about my life with my ex and I explained a little bit about it and he went on and on talking about how I worked for my ex and how I like broke ni$_as even though that was not the case at all.
There were situations that my kids needed things and I definitely was not about to let them go without so I took a temporary job to satisfy the need at the time but he just kept going on and on about it saying I should work for him now I keep telling him the situation is not the same he is not him and my kids are grown. Then he’ll say I really loved that ni#$a. He wants that kind of love truth be told he has never treated me the way my ex did my feelings are not the same for him at all and more then likely never will be.
I am older wiser stronger and don’t want to love that way again especially with a man that can’t belong to me and only me. I have a lot to offer a mate and if he can’t give me something as simple as some of his time why would I give him my unconditional love I matter and to the right person I will mean the world to. He refuses to see that but still wants my best for him while he never sees his faults or what causes me my distress in him he will say I find things wrong that are not wrong. Happy Saturday y’all I will not let him mess with my mind period.
He is back home yay
My grandson is back home with my daughter I am so happy for her having him back she kept her cool kept doing the work and it paid off.
I tried to share my good news to my narcissistic husband (big mistake) he took my news and turned it into a whole conversation about him and how bad women are 🙃😒🙄 I just kept saying geeze I’m sure sorry I even told you because you can never just celebrate with me it always has to go into something about you.
He says that by me saying that I made the whole conversation about me I told him at this point I’m getting off the phone with you because I refuse to be your punching bag any more (verbally of course) and I hung up the phone he kept calling me back saying because he pays the phone bill I don’t have a right to get off the phone he is a classic Libra for real with his entitlement attitude he has all the time this crazy.
He lives in his karma and it doesn’t let up because of the way he treats everyone especially me I try to talk to him but he will tell me I’m karma which is not true because I don’t treat people bad or use people for personal gain I don’t have a, you do for me and I’ll do for you attitude, because that’s not a positive way to be. I believe it’s you do unto others as you would have them do unto you, but he doesn’t believe that he believes if they do for him he will do for them he always has to be getting something in return no matter what and that selfish.
The struggle is now not forever 