Today I turned 47 and I am very proud of that I had a very good day I woke up this morning to a delightfully wonderful cup of coffee that my sister made me she makes the best coffee I will say that it is always the right amount of sweetness and has this wonderful flavor that goes right along with it simply delicious next I wanted to get out for a while so I got on the bus and rolled around to the store to get some stuff for my favorite meal but to my surprise when I got back to the house I had some food waiting for me a delicious chicken meal with french fries and a soda. This made my day throughout the day I got all of the wonderful phone calls from all of my favorite people and then my sister made my favorite meal spaghetti which was the best in to my day I was going to go out but it decided to rain so I took a rain check on that I heard from everyone I needed to hear from and I am happy about that. I absolutely love my family and friends good night you guys happy birthday to me!
Tag: friends
Lil Durk concert
Today I’m at a lil Durk concert because I won tickets it’s nothing more telling then when you win something and have no one to share it with so I came alone but I’m still happy to be here because I know good still comes to me even with out anyone else no matter how much they say I’m not favored I still am and it shows every day of my life anyway happy Tuesday.
My husband got out of the hospital
It had been a week and he was still not doing well when I called 911 for him he had scared me and I wasn’t going to lose him. He was talking crazy but he was alive, I couldn’t put my finger on it and I didn’t know how to cope with it but I knew he wasn’t ready to go home in a short amount of time he was putting his affairs in order telling me what to do and how I would be able to sustain myself after he was gone and that was not rational to me him being in his 40s we have a whole life to live and I kept telling him that but he wasn’t trying to hear me he just kept saying let him go. When they finally got him to a point where he was starting to get of sound mind he began to blame me for keeping him there and that hurt even worse because when I care about somebody their life is the most important thing to me and their survival is paramount to everything else. I would never want anything to happen to him despite his treatment of people or me I still want him around because everybody deserves every chance until that last chance is given now I feel like an outsider because I wanted to check on him and was told they will see if he’s up for company (While staying at a non-immediate family members house) when I’m his wife now I’m a part of everybody else amazing that really hurts when I am the one that got him to the hospital it’s crazy if I’m only the tables were turned.
A day missed
I was so active yesterday that I didn’t realize how much that was going to effect my body today I usually have the same routine. But when I get up this morning I was so tired that I couldn’t function or move so I kept saying a few more minutes that turned into a few hours and missed appointments.
I still ended up going food shopping but was even more exhausted after that been trying to get my spring cleaning done but it’s like this house has never ending work to do and it is really overwhelming I don’t want to give up though just wish I had friends to join in it would be different but I don’t have someone like that. Anyway happy Wednesday
Late night hour
Most nights I don’t sleep I stay up and think and clean when I’m not working I do a lot of soul-searching and trying to figure out how I can get my passion out in the world because I love working with small children my dream is to have little children learning as much as they can before their brains become concrete and they are no longer able to absorb masses of information at an early age which will give them a love for learning for a lifetime. I have always watched from the time my children were little them absorb information so quickly and be in all by how they saw the world and so excited with them and for them to see everything that I had saw through fresh eyes.
When I look at children I know that they are the next great in this world and with the right nourishment and guidance they will become a memorable part of this society and this is why I try to work as hard as I can to encourage that growth and make them be the best that they can be I’m so proud of my own children and the children that I work with even though sometimes they can be difficult and give me a hard timeWhen I look at children I know that they are the next great in this world and with the right nourishment and guidance they will become a memorable part of this society and this is why I try to work as hard as I can to encourage that growth and make them be the best that they can be I’m so proud of my own children and the children that I work with even though sometimes they can be difficult and give me a hard time
I listen to Steve Harvey in the morning when I have time and he always gives the right motivational speech to say if you’re doing something that you love it never feels like a job and that is so true because when I’m working with kids it never feels like a drag or something that I hate doing I really love seeing their faces the joy in their eyes even when they roll their eyes because they see they’re gonna have to do some work with me it’s stillI listen to Steve Harvey in the morning when I have time and he always gives the right motivational speech to say if you’re doing something that you love it never feels like a job and that is so true because when I’m working with kids it never feels like a drag or something that I hate doing I really love seeing their faces the joy in their eyes even when they roll their eyes because they see they’re gonna have to do some work with me it’s still brings me peace in knowing that they will know something more when they leave my classroom and they will have a little bit more respect for themselves and their classmates as well as me for trying to help them be better at whatever it is they need to know. We’re going into spring break and I’m going to use this time to reflect on how I can help them better during this next period of time when I’ll be working with them. Happy break everyone I will be keeping up with my diet while on spring break I have lost even more weight over this time and I am not giving up this is my goal for the year and I will not stop until I reach my goal
He did it on purpose
I was out looking at my car today I saw all these scratches on her at first couldn’t understand what had happened to my baby then I realized my husband’s son is the only one who washes my car and he washed my car with a rag that had branches and leaves in it and didn’t care what it did to my car even though I am the one who drives him around everywhere he goes I felt like that was messed up and if I had the choice he would walk everywhere from now on frfr anyway happy Monday
He is so evil
I was up late last night trying to find new friends and enjoy my night when my husband begins to tell me to go to bed like I’m a child he tells me to chill out cause I was laughing at some of the conversations I was having with my friends on my computer to the point that he came to see who I was talking to and demanding that I stop being happy and go to bed saying I would have to get up early when that was not true. When I told him that he began to hit me over and over again and yell at me for no reason like what I was doing was so terrible then he took my things away (my phone, computer, and pad and told me my things were not mine which was crazy I was so upset I was crying and couldn’t think straight as he kept demanding that I listen to him or he would hurt me again he kept forcing me to drink and telling me how much he doesn’t care about how I feel it was so disrespectful and disheartening but I made it through he will get his soon enough.
He said I’m not worth shit wow
My husband said I’m not worth shit yeah because I did not agree with his opinion wow that’s crazy I never thought that I would have to deal with someone who’s out like I was not worth shit because I didn’t agree with their opinion quite interesting the classic definition of a narcissist would be this man. He seems to be upset right now because I’m not saying what he wants me to say and the words that he used our backfiring on him I guess and that’s why he’s mad now whatever and dealing with it he can be mad all he wants is at the end of the day he needs to learn that if he’s not decisive he’s indecisive and indecisiveness doesn’t get you nowhere so be mad be angry but deal with it the fuck ever it doesn’t pay to be a narcissist and have to deal with someone who knows how to deal with a narcissist I guess but I don’t give a fuck because my sister was a Libra just like my husband and he hast to learn so he grabbed me again and said he’s strong lol that’s funny he must not realize I’m just as strong as he is so I pushed his hand away showing him that his mediocre strength isn’t shit whatever I’m gonna go to bed now but if he touches me again it will be the last time he ever does
Happy New Year
Today is January 1st 2021 I finally came up with my New Year’s resolutions this year is a year of completion I’m going to work at completing a lot of my goals this year I started them last year but this year it is my goal to complete them. I am excited to live my best life and do the things that will bring joy happiness and excitement to my life and those that I love around me.
Always feel like everyday is a new beginning a chance to start over and accomplish things that I didn’t accomplish the day before but this time I’m not only will accomplish those things I will add on to them and not give up anyway happy New Year here’s to a year of accomplishing goals finishing task and having fun while doing it.
Happy Saturday Peep’s
I got a bonus today I am a true believer that if I take one step forward the universe will take 10. I have always believed that if I always put positive vibes out I will get positive vibes and actions back as well as be favored there’s nothing that I have put my best foot forward on and not seen a great outcome on in my life which is why I always say favor ain’t fair!
Then I got bad news my daughter broke her foot while walking her dog I hate it when they are hurting in any case it’s like I always know when something is wrong I wake up in the middle of the night and can’t go back to sleep then the child affected comes to mind and I can’t shake the feeling that something is going on with them and I will immediately begin to talk to them until I feel the problem is rectified then I can rest. I’m so glad it was just a broken foot because I am a person who doesn’t handle trauma well and loss even worse.
This week had it’s ups and downs but for the most part I’m really glad I made it through and I hope you all are glad you did too. I’m doing good on my weight loss journey as well I was able to put on some stretch pants that I couldn’t fit some time ago and they fit me good and I looked good in them talk about happy but I’m not stopping until I reach my goal. It’s my niece birthday party today I’m so happy for her she is so smart and beautiful I love her Enjoy the rest of your Saturday.
The struggle is now not forever 